alright.... time to dispel you fuckers who read this self absorbed drivil.
I do it fact like myself...
not like I like beer or anything but I do, upon occasion, cross paths
with one or more redemable traits that indeed are my very own!
I feel like my lexicon is laced with negativeity, due partially to the idea I have upheald for several years, this idea being "if i cut myself down first I will have the upper hand." Yes, ridiculous you say? retarded even? hmmm not very P.C. of you but i will take it. So as I'm sure my mental health care provider will tell me when i sit down in her chair a few weeks from now I will construct a list of possitive attributes.

1. I'm smart... not like that paralyzed invented gravity sort of smart
but I'm witty enough to make it through conversation with adults and peers
alike, and still quote stupid literature from high shcool and other random sources.(but I can't spell for shit!)Smart enough to make opinions and repeat them with little or no fear of sounding lame.

2. I'm not Sigfred the fucking sea monster.(the ugly thing) I cannot say that I am "beautiful" or "hot", but simply I know i did'nt roll snake-eyes in the looks department.(I'm a pretty girl who likes to wear pink! there I said it!!) I should'nt subject ya'll to the I'm too ugly to live speech anymore.

3. I can cook. (a little bit of self depricating here because last night I managed to ruin my favorite dish, I'm more than a little pissed about it but whatever its cool) but I can really!

4. I can dance. It makes me happy. Ballet, tap, hip hop ,(you don't stop), bellydance, whatever I wish I learned Capoia, but no time no time.

5. I have taste, highly stylized, and opinionated, but i'm able to disern what I like and why, musicaly, cinematicly, and artisticly. (this is a misspelled way of me telling you all that my tastes rein supreme over your crappy prefrences
((notice "humble" is not on this list.))

6.I have alot of heart. (and no I don't mean I have the hearts of others in a jar in my bed room! though it is pleasing idea) I'm very sensitive to others when people are'nt looking, I cry...alot. And I will more than likely feed you before I feed myself. (enter violin music) Because I'm a giver god damn it. a true believer in the kindness of the human condition. I love you.

7. I can make you laugh...if not with the jokes and dry humor than with the tip of my glock pressed into your face, mother fucker.... if I had a glock.....

8. I want to make you happy. all of you... except Crullea DuVill in my painting class. She can ... well you know suck a dick.

9. I'm artistic... I never knew painting rabbits fucking would take me so far! I also learned how to make amazing prints, thank you Hank...and my tutor Icarus.

and drum roll please.....

10. Ambition...lots and lots of hot sweaty self servicing ambition.
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thank you for listening and if you didn't bugger of you sodding fuck! I'm cool and there's nothing you can do about it.

I needed that. ((stupid looking smile))